Category Archives: Family Counseling

Family Matters of the Heart!!

Family Counseling, Healthy Coping Mechanisms, Healthy Relationship, Holiday gatherings, Individual Therapy, Mental Health, Plymouth

As we approach the holiday season, it’s important to reflect on the complexities of family dynamics. I know firsthand how challenging this time can be, especially with the loss of loved ones and the drama that can arise among those still around. Coming from a large family with diverse ethnicities and cultures, I have fond memories of gatherings filled with love and laughter. In the past, these gatherings were a cherished tradition, but as our matriarchs have passed and families have drifted apart, those moments have become rare. I often find myself longing for the warmth and joy we once shared, including the lighthearted gossip that often accompanied our celebrations.

The pandemic further complicated our family interactions, as concerns over health led to decreased participation in gatherings. My family has always been a cornerstone of my identity, encompassing both my biological relatives and my chosen family. Unfortunately, my own challenges have added to the strain. After a car accident involving family members, I faced a difficult insurance lawsuit against my cousin. This situation caused some family members to distance themselves from me, and I encountered criticism for my decisions.

Compounding these issues, I am part of the LGBTQIA community. I came out publicly with my wife during the lawsuit, which was not well received by some family members. As a result, when I was invited to gatherings, it often felt like I was walking on eggshells, with an unspoken tension surrounding our situation.

This holiday season marks the first time my wife and I will attend family gatherings as a married couple since the lawsuit concluded two years ago. Throughout this tumultuous period, I have accomplished a great deal: I graduated with my bachelor’s degree, started my master’s program, recovered from extensive back surgery, and moved into my first home with my wife.

I understand how difficult these situations can be, and I hope we can all find ways to navigate our family relationships and still enjoy the holidays.

Family plays a big role in our lives. It can greatly affect our mental health, which is how we think and feel. When families are supportive and loving, it helps us feel safe and happy. However, when there are problems, it can lead to stress and sadness.

Here are some tips I have learned:

Stressful Family Situations

Not all families are supportive. Some families may argue a lot or have problems that make members feel anxious. For instance, if parents are going through a divorce, children might feel caught in the middle. They may worry about the future or feel guilty about the situation. This kind of stress can lead to issues like depression or anxiety, which affect a person’s overall well-being. Differences in opinions including politics can seperate family and create resentment. With their being even more ways for a family to have tension it can truly impact one another as anger is a secondary emotion, deep down there is sadness for the situation at hand.

Communication and Boundaries 

If families started talking openly about their feelings and allow for all to be seen and heard, we can all handle problems better. When everyone expresses their thoughts, it helps to reduce misunderstandings by validating each other for how they feel but leaving room fod there to be a resolution. For instance, if a adult feels overwhelmed by childhood trauma, discussing it with parents and other family members can lead to solutions and creating boundaries. This communication helps strengthen family bonds and improves mental health.

The Role of Family Activities

Additionally, spending time together as a family can also enhance boundaries. Create a new space to be open to creating new memories, but not replace, can create a new direction forward. Activities like family dinners, game nights, or outings provide a chance to connect. These moments create happy memories and reinforce relationships. When family members enjoy time together, it builds a sense of belonging, which is crucial for emotional health.  Sometimes you have to be the one to engage these activities.

If you or your family is struggling, it’s important to seek help. Therapy or counseling can provide support and teach families how to communicate better. A professional can help identify issues and suggest ways to resolve conflicts. This support can make a significant difference in the mental health of everyone involved.

Click the link to view our staff that would best fit your needs,   https://www.apexwesternwayne.com/our-staff/

Family matters greatly when it comes to mental health. A loving and supportive family can help us feel secure and happy. However, stressful situations and poor communication can lead to mental health problems. By focusing on support, communication, and quality time, families can create a healthier environment. Remember, it’s okay to ask for help if needed. Taking care of our mental health is essential for a happy life.

Have a beautiful weekend lovies.

 

With love,

Monique

Harmony in Dialogue: Nurturing Communication in Marriage

Family Counseling, Healthy Coping Mechanisms, Marital counseling, Mental Health, ,

Better communication in marriage can make a big difference.  The relationship between marriage and communication is deeply intertwined and crucial for a healthy and fulfilling partnership.

Here are some ways couples can communicate better:

  1. Understanding and Connection:  Effective communication allows couples to understand each other’s thoughts, feelings, and needs better.  It fosters emotional connection by providing a platform for sharing experiences, dreams, and concerns.
  2. Express Feelings: It is important to share how you feel with your partner, using “I” statements like “I feel sad when…” instead of blaming your partner.  We are accountable for our own actions as well as how someone may make us feel.
  3. Be Honest: Always tell the truth, even if it’s hard, honesty builds trust, which is essential for a strong relationship.  When spouses feel comfortable expressing themselves without fear of judgement or reprisal, it creates a safe and supportive environment where trust can flourish.
  4. Use Kind Words: Kindness can prevent arguments from escalating.  Anger is a secondary emotion because the root is actually sadness or the fear of being hurt.
  5. Compromise: Marriage is about give and take.  Try to find solutions that make both of you happy.  Healthy communication skills enable couples to resolve disagreements constructively, without resorting to hurtful behavior that could possibly damage the relationship.
  6. Respect Boundaries: Everyone needs space sometimes, respect the space allow for each other to have that peaceful time.
  7. Maintaining Intimacy:   Communication plays a vital role in maintaining intimacy and connection in marriage.  Expressing affection, sharing compliments, and engaging in meaningful conversation help keep the spark alive and deepen emotional intimacy.

When something really tough happens in a marriage, like one partner having an affair or mishandling money, it can feel like everything is falling apart.

  1. Take Time to Feel Hurt:  It’s normal to feel really hurt and upset when something bad happens.  It is vital to take time to feel those feelings and talk about them with you partner.
  2. Talk About What Happened:  It’s important both partners to talk honestly about what happened.  This means being brave and listening to each other without blaming or getting defensive.
  3. Apologize and Take Responsibility: If one partner did something wrong or both partners, it’s crucial for them to apologize sincerely and take responsibility for their actions.  This show that they understand that they not only hurt the partner but where they need to do better at.
  4. Rebuild Trust:  Rebuilding trust takes time and effort.  Both partners need to be patient and consistent.  This means keeping promises, being honest, and showing that they can be trust again.
  5. Seek Help if Needed:   Sometimes it’s hard to rebuilding a relationship on your own.  It’s to ask for help from a therapist or counselor who can guide you through the process.  We have great therapy service to help provide the needs to continue your growth together or separately, for more information regarding our highly trained staff,  Click here!!

Overall, good communication helps couples understand each other better, reduces stress, and strengthens their bond, while poor communication can lead to misunderstandings, stress, and feelings of loneliness or resentment.

For more information on good ways to communicate, click here.

 

Have a sunny weekend .

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY TO ALL YOU BEAUTIFUL WOMEN, YOU ARE IMPORTANT.

SINCERELY,

MONIQUE

 

 

 

References:

Aime, W. B. (2024, March 22). Resilience in relationships: overcoming difficulties together — healing unapologetically. Healing Unapologetically. https://www.healing.thriveunburdened.org/blog/resilience-in-relationships?gad_source=1&gclid=CjwKCAjwi_exBhA8EiwA_kU1MjxFCHMqMFCboWt2U9lBaKPnZvWave4KMgbuNtO2knnKVud7EAAEKxoCBjUQAvD_BwE